Between the CALL and the treatment plan.. the wait..the questions and the shock!

So I have cancer, now what?  As a planner as soon as I found out I felt that I needed to get appointments in line.  My doctor gave me a few breast surgeons names and I asked around some I initially thought that I would have surgery right away, but after meeting with several doctors I found out that was not the recommended treatment plan for me.

On March 18th (Friday) I already had appointments set up for the following week with doctors, the first doctor I visited gave me such a sense of calmness I just loved her calm tone and that she was my age with children the same age as my two children.  The location she was in was so personal and not huge like the hustle and bustle of a hospital location.  I knew the evening after meeting with her that she was the one for me but I had to at least check out others.

Before I was told I had breast cancer I thought all breast cancers were the same.  Who would of known there are so many different types/factors and that 2 women can have breast cancer and it c an be a completely different type. 

My cancer is IDC meaning it has now advanced outside the tissues of the milk ducts.  I am ER+ which is Estrogen positive and PR+ which is Progesterone positive. So basically my cancer gets signals from these hormones or such, after my chemo/radiation and surgery I will have to me on medication for5 years to block these receptors.  My mass was originally said to be around 3.5 cm on the mammogram findings, with all the pathology reports and scans my cancer has been staged at a IIb since it showed up in two lymph nodes.  Last Tuesday my mass was measured at roughly 4.5 cm.

The recommendation was to do chemotherapy prior to surgery to kill any cells that might be floating around in my body but not showing up on the CT scan and to hopefully shrink everything in my lymph nodes so I would not need any of those removed.  After chemo then surgery comes .. what type is up to me and then radiation.  Needless to say for a planner having the next year of your life in question between treatments and surgery is very hard.

Then don't forget my kids... telling them was hard but I read some information on how to approach the topic for different aged kids and that really helped.  I also refuse to let them see me down, they have questions like "Why does God let bad things happen to good people?" and its hard to know the right answers but I told them God has a reason and they must not be angry with him.